Laxative Abuse

I am empty.
18 laxatives later and all I am is water and blood.
I am in pain. I skipped my first class today simply because I was writhing in pain.
The good news is, my severe stomach cramps kept me from eating all day. So far, my calorie count is 3. I had a stick of gum today for Lunch. Dinner is in 30 minutes and I feel invincible
I can do this
I will do this.
Christmas, i will be thin.. 
Perfect.

I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat. I Will Not Eat.
I Ate.
A Fistful of laxatives. 

University Life

Its been too long since I've posted. I've moved far, far away to pursue my education. I've moved far away from my failure, from my enemies and my friends. No more strange looks in the Cafeteria as I toss my entire lunch in the trash, no more pestering mother counting every bite as I painfully chew and swallow. It's just me and my roommate Ana.
I can feel myself slipping further and further down the rabbit hole; my body tingles with anticipation an excitement.
By Christmas I will be Thin,
                                         Beautiful.